[164] He’s unresponsive cuz you’re irresponsible

Title’s from a line in Death Cab For Cutie’s song “Amputations”. Ben Gibbard, as you have so many times before, you’ve hit the nail right on the fucking head.

It’s funny how some people are so hell-bent on blindly doing what only works for them, and not calculating other people into the equation. But I suppose that’s just how their selfish brains operate. It’s totally fine though, because people like that tend to just burn bridges left and right no matter if they do it with someone they’re romantically involved with or just friends. This person has a tendency to do it with both types of people. It’s happened before, it’s happening now (and I’m not the only person whose bridge she’s burning either so that’s quasi-comforting), and it’ll continue to happen. So what are they going to be left with?

That’s right. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. Hey, I tried not to be salty, I really did, but if she’s going to go and attempt to pull some shit like this? Fuck THAT. In fact, I’m not even going to be salty about it. There’s no real bitterness here. I think I’ve reached the point where I just flat out stop caring. Which is so much better than being angry at a person (and worse for them. Much worse).

So bon voyage, and so long, asshole! Enjoy your little trip. You’re not wanted here.

———————————

In happier news, fuckin’ Chris fuckin’ Slaight has a blog! FUCKIN’ NICE!

With this, we form the Douche Coalition. Heh heh.

[163] The less you shave, the more we roast

Brian
AIM
2:49
i was thinking of some roasts
2:49
for that girl you say has a beard
2:51
“Ol’ Neil O’Donnell guiding the Pittsburgh Steelers to Super Bowl XXX beard-having ass bitch”
http://www3.jsonline.com/packer/arc/0124/image/neil.jpg

Isaac Lopez
AIM
2:53
LOL you are something else
2:54
“Ol’ Richard Karn ‘WHO WANTS TO PLAY FAMILY FEUD OH WAIT I DONT THINK SO TIM’ beard-having ass bitch” imo

Brian
AIM
2:54
^^^^^^^^ well-played
2:54
Ol’ Bob Vila getting knocked over by a 2×4 from Tim Taylor on Tool Time beard having ass-bitch

Isaac Lopez
AIM
2:56
Ol’ Brawny Lumberjack “MORE ABSORBENT THAN THE LEADING PAPER TOWEL” beard having ass bitch

Brian
AIM
2:57
Ol’ Chester A. Arthur enjoying a rustic picnic in the woods beard-having ass bitch
http://www.presidentprofiles.com/Grant-Eisenhower/James-A-Garfield-and-Chester-A-Arthur-A-strong-hand-at-sea-and-overseas.html

——————————

Yes. Good to be blogging again.

[162] I have a blog? What bl— oh, right…

So I’ve been on an extended break from blogging, mostly due to a lack of things to blog about (or so I thought). In reality, so much has been happening in the past month and a half and I never really realized it.

At first, I realized that I’m doomed, as far as my academic major. Journalism is a dying industry. The chances of me getting a job in this day and age that field are little to none. So, I turned to my back-up. For a short time, I was considering taking up the conductor job, no matter when I got the call. But then I realized that making a career with the MTA would require me to stay in New York for at least the next 30 years. Then I got to thinking, “Do I really want to spend the rest of my life in New York?”

No. Sure, the only reason that I came back to NYC from Oneonta over a year ago was because I hated Oneonta so much, but I highly believe that it was the fact that I was living in the middle of nowhere, in a small town with only one bar, one Dunkin Donuts, and no Starbucks, that drove me crazy. So the fact is that I need a big city. Not New York specifically.

So taking the MTA job is now pretty much out of the question. See, I’ve been stuck on the Eastern seaboard my whole life. The farthest north I’ve gone was Boston. The farthest south I’ve gone was D.C. I need to get out. I need to see what life is like on the other side. I can’t be stuck here forever. I’ll probably go insane (and many will argue that I already have).

Hello, West Coast. I’m strongly considering a move to Seattle, but anywhere on the West Coast is fair game. As for how I’m going to make any money? Let’s just hope I get a decent paying job at some sort of newspaper / magazine doing online stuff (since that’s where it’s all going). Or Barnes and Noble.

[161] A true realization

It’s funny, the way you learn little things about yourself. I just realized how much of an alcoholic I’ve become over the past year. There was nothing to drink in my refrigerator except for fruit punch and water, so I opted for the fruit punch. Then I realized: this was the first time I drank fruit punch without vodka or any other kind of alcohol in it in a LONG time. Like… perhaps a year, at least.

My 21st birthday is in a few days. It’s only going to get worse from there.

[160] A little life update

The month started off fantastically. New year, new opportunities, everything was great. But like I told a few friends during this high period (my general pessimism NEVER fades, which is good, because this way, nothing can really surprise me anymore), the shit was about to hit the fan.

Well… the shit had hit the fan. And while the resulting mess wasn’t as terrible as I thought, the mess is still a mess and it requires a bit of cleaning up. Part my fault, part hers (well… 70% her, 30% me).

I’ve gotten out of worse before, with people who were far more worth it, so I don’t think this should be too difficult.

Other than this, everything is peachy.

Song of the day: Elliott Smith – A Distorted Reality Is Now A Necessity To Be Free

[159] SUPERFUN AWESOMETIME “24″ ADVENTURES, 1/12 edition

Every time they mention a “near miss” on the show, I can’t help but think back to those George Carlin videos I posted a while back. Because it’s so fucking true.

“IT’S A NEAR HIT! A COLLISION IS A NEAR MISS!”

*explosion*

“Look… they nearly missed.”

[158] A plan that warrants some consideration

Back in July I made a post about how I’d like to move out and have my own place (or live with a roommate or two) by the end of 2009. Seeing how it’s 2009 already, I think it’s time I begin taking this plan seriously. I’m considering maybe taking out a student loan for this. (I already owe some money for my semester in Oneonta, so what’s another couple thousand for another year?)

I’m going to be 21 in 29 days(!) and I think it’s time I start living my own life. Not that I don’t have one now, I just think it’s time for a change (no Obama ‘08)… one that I don’t think can wait until after I graduate school.

Stay tuned.

Song of the day: Superchunk – The First Part

[157] Ever see a guy say goodbye to a Sidekick LX before?

So much of the last two days have been spent playing around with my new iPhone, and so far it’s so worth the $260 I spent buying it secondhand off of Craigslist. The jerk I bought it from clearly doesn’t know how to take good care of a phone, since the back and sides are kinda scratched up, but at least he had enough sense to put on a screen protector, as the screen is as smooth as a baby’s ass. I had to buy a secondhand first generation iPhone since my T-Mobile contract isn’t up until next April, and 1) I didn’t want to pay an assload of money to cancel my T-Mobile contract early and sign up with AT&T just to pay a bigger assload of money monthly for their insanely expensive iPhone plan, and 2) unlocked iPhone 3Gs were going for $500-600 on Craigslist. Enough said. I’ll gladly pay half the price for an older beat up iPhone.

Most of all, it finally feels good to have a phone that I could take out and not feel like a 15 year old girl for having one.

 

Anyways, today’s plan: exercise a bit, go out and buy a new printer (never again, fucking HP), perhaps some monitor wipes for my laptop as well (I still haven’t forgotten how much of a dirty slobfuck I felt during jury duty, as everyone had pristine clean laptops you could eat off of, making mine look comparatively like something that should be quarantined by the FDA). Seeing how it’s almost 5pm and I still haven’t done a goddamn thing, I should probably get on some of that.

Song of the day: The Decemberists – O New England

[156] SUPERFUN AWESOMETIME JURY DUTY ADVENTURES, 1/6 edition

• 11:33am: So here I am, back for seconds at the land of titillating and exciting opportunities, otherwise known as the fucking New York County Courthouse Building on 100 Centre Street. Only two things keeping me from going insane are my MacBook and my iPod (playing Pavement’s Brighten the Corners, which they’ve been playing quite a lot of at work. Definitely beats the shit out of Virgin Megastore’s playlist, which pretty much consisted of that shit Katy Perry song from tracks 1 – 9394783461274698124790). Though it’s a hell of a lot better than actually being called into a courtroom, I’ll say that. I really hope they don’t call anyone today, mostly because there’s supposed to be a new batch of jurors. Let them use those jerks, because I’ve got shit to do.

• 11:54am: There’s a lady a couple of rows in front of me reading the book The Secret, written in spanish. For those of you who don’t know (and I wasn’t totally clear on what it was all about until I started working at Barnes and Noble), it’s basically “the secret” that people like Shakespeare and Abe Lincoln had in order to achieve success. Basically, in a nutshell, they wanted it so bad, they got it. Yes. That’s THE SECRET. Complete load of bullshit. My favorite memory of this book was being with my ex on the 6 train one day, taking a peek of a page from the book, and noticing that it cites someone named Dr. Assaraf. I started to laugh at the dude’s name, because it had the word ASS in it. This clearly irked her, which made me laugh even more, making a bad situation worse. Ahh… good times.

 

• 12:34pm: YEA BOY… finished for six years! SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEE YA

[155] SUPERFUN AWESOMETIME JURY DUTY ADVENTURES, 1/5 edition

 

10:13am: *hits head on laptop* This morning gets 9.5 fails out of 10. Here’s what happened. First off, I had originally set my alarm for 7:20am, planning on getting downtown to Centre Street at 8:30-8:45, because I lost the original summons that they sent me. Turns out, I wake up at fucking 8:10am.

“OH BUT YOUR FATHER TOLD ME TO WAKE YOU UP AT 8!” -Dear ol’ Mom

Yeah, well my fucking father isn’t the one who has to now has to fucking get downtown from the Upper West Side in 35 minutes. Good thing I showered the night before. Anyways, I brush my teeth, half-assedly comb my hair, get dressed and leave. Right when I’m leaving, my father tells me “Oh, go to 96th Street and take the 2 or 3 down to Park Place, it’ll get you there faster.”

And like the complete and utter fucking dumbass that I am, I get off at Park Place, only to be completely disoriented by the tiny, non-numbered streets of lower Manhattan. I end up near Fulton Street until I finally have the balls to ask some fake Prada bag-selling jerkoff vendor if he could tell me where Centre Street is. By the way, it’s 9am at this point.

Me: “Hey, could you tell me where Centre Street is?”

Fake bag selling jerkoff: “When you see a guy, you tell him good morning.” (I should’ve called him an abortion gone wrong and his mother a useless cum receptacle at this point, but my main focus was getting to the damn courthouse on time.) “Walk up this street here about 3 lights to Broadway. Then ask someone up there.”

What the fuck? He’s pretty much sending me away to ask someone else. I’m already pissed at this point and this fuckball was not helping any.

Me: “Alright, if you’re just going to tell me where Broadway is then fine but don’t be a dick about it.”

And I walk away and immediately turn on my iPod so I didn’t hear anything he said, but I know he yelled something back at me as I walked away and probably called me an asshole or something.

So I eventually find Centre Street, realizing that listening to my father was a big fat mistake, as it usually is about 98.8% of the time. I get to 60 Centre, and I have to go to some juror office to get the summons that I didn’t have. After waiting about 20 minutes or so, I get called, by probably one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. Too bad this means that if I had decided to ask her out on a date or something, that would have meant she would have came out to be a complete and total bitch from hell, because that’s what they all are. But enough on my philosophy on women, I’m getting sidetracked.

In classic Isaac Lopez fashion, I had fucked myself. As it turns out, my jury duty date was TOMORROW. Not today. Absolutely fantastic. However, which is totally NOT in line with what my life is like, she offered me a way out, saying that she’ll try and put me on the list for today. Which is good, because I know I didn’t go through all of that bullshit, what with the 3 train and the mega-jerkoff fake Prada bag selling dickhead on Fulton Street for nothing. Besides, I had kinda already put in for January 5th and 6th off, and while they still didn’t schedule me for Wednesday at work, I didn’t feel like even risking hearing anything from my manager if she looks at the summons and is like “OMGZ THIS WUZ FOR TEH 6TH AND 7TH BUT U WENT ON TEH 5TH AND 6TH WUT IS WRONG WIFF U?!?!”. Or something of that sort.

And after all is said and done, here I sit, in a giant assfuck jury waiting room getting here at 10am, about an hour after everyone else probably showed up… there’s about a good 100-150 people here, maybe a bit more. I sincerely hope I don’t end up getting called in for a trial… the last thing I need right now is to have my life thrown into disarray (more than it is already, now isn’t that a scary thought?).

• 10:47am: Listening to Superchunk’s album “Foolish”. Thinking I should’ve tried harder to get out of jury duty altogether, instead of simply taking my chances and being put into what the girl at 60 Centre said was a full jury pool. Oh well.

 

• 11:22am: Still sitting in the jury assembly room. The longer I’m here, the far better off I am. Though I’m getting ridiculously hungry, I wonder what I should have for lunch.

 

• 12:04pm: Still here. No names have been called yet, and lunch is supposed to be in under an hour. This seems somewhat promising, at least for today, but I really don’t want to jinx anything. Though I did realize that I have to clean my MacBook, very, very badly.

 

• 12:53pm: They let us out for lunch pretty early, around 12:15pm, told us to be back at 2:15. A two hour lunch break, pretty good deal. Lucky for me, I found a Starbucks with wifi. Unluckily for me (read: typical Isaac Lopez bullshit), the only good wifi spot in the store is next to some rambling mentally unstable black guy.

 

• 1:24pm: Still at the Starbucks on Broadway and Reade. I’ve moved away from the mentally unstable black guy to a spot with kinda shoddy wifi but it’s better than nothing. MacBook almost died, so I had to ask some woman sitting across from me if I could plug my charger in the socket under her seat. Then I asked her if I could plug my MacBook in. HI-YOOOOOOO! *rimshot*

 

• 2:12pm: Whoa, crazy shit… just saw a girl I went to high school with, Karen, in the elevator. Turns out she got a summons too for today, but for a grand jury. Also, another friend of mine has jury duty today, but in a different building. How about that!

 

• 2:28pm: Yet another instance of “wtf, don’t I know this person?” just happened. There’s a girl sitting two rows in front of me who looks a lot like this girl who was in my creative writing class last semester. Not sure if it’s her, but it very well could be (and no, Brian, I would not pipe this one). Wait… yeah, I just got a look at her face. It’s definitely her. At this rate I won’t be surprised if my fucking ex-girlfriend comes waltzing in here.

 

• 2:47pm: They just called people for the first case… and I wasn’t chosen! Thank God…

 

• 3:30pm: YES, going home! Just gotta go in tomorrow for attendance and hopefully that means we’re done for good.